inversely, you aren’t the same person as the one that fell in love with her. you are both different people now and you even have a relationship now that will shape you even further :]. part of it is accepting like the other commenter pointed out: human minds are weird

I don’t love her, I don’t want to be with her, I don’t want her in my life.

are you sure about that? there must be something about her that pervades your mind and compells you to (want to) invite her for coffee, not to mention the stalking. i know this comes off as inflammatory, but i think it’s important to consider the possibility that you are in denial; after all, you absolutely have a vested interest in those 3 statements being true